The Best Age Gap In Between Babies

{brothers :) from our 3D ultrasound last week}

One of the most common questions that I get, and also see other parents asking other parents about, is what is the best age gap in between babies. I think it's natural that every parent wants to find that truly perfect age gap so that the transition can be the best that it can be, but I don't think there is a right answer out there. I really don't!

I believe every age gap has it's pros and cons, and instead of focusing on finding the best age gap according to other people and their beliefs (I think everyone sort of thinks they have the best age gap, so your answers will be totally mixed!), the best thing to do is decide what works best for you and your family and what you want.

For us, we've always known that we wanted kids close in age. Camden and baby #2 (counting down the days until I can share his name) will be 18 months apart. A lot of people would call us bat shit crazy for wanting and planning it this way, but then others (the other "bat shit crazy" parents that also have this age gap most likely) have nothing but amazing things to say about this age gap. Before trying for our second and even before Camden was born, we would casually talk about the pros of having kids close in age, and we were both on the same page that they definitely outweighed any cons that we came up with. Obviously I have absolutely no experience with 2 kids yet, so I'm writing this post simply to share the pros and cons we came up with. It'll be fun to write a similar post once baby brother is here to see how much of this held true once I have actual experience (and to see if any of our feelings change...)

PROS:

1. Closeness in age means being able to play games/sports together, growing up in the same schools, and in general just being in close 'stages' in life. They have a playmate and best friend for life!

2. Getting through the baby stage rather quickly. I don't like saying getting it over with, but that's technically what I'm saying right...? I guess it is, ha. By having kids close in age, you are familiar with those newborn days...the lack of sleep...the constant changing diapers...etc. You're already in the routine of it all.

3. This goes with #2...Strolling through pregnancies like a boss. Some might consider being pregnant back to back a con, but for me it's a pro. I would much rather go through my pregnancies now than when I'm older when I might not be able to handle them as well. Let's say you want 3 kids and space them out 3 years apart...you're pretty much pregnant on and off for 10 years. Or what if you take an even bigger break and then have a really hard time with the thought of being pregnant again / going through all the body changes?

4. You might be able to get them on the same schedule! Hello, NAPS! Your oldest is probably still taking 1 (or 2) naps, so if you can get baby on the same schedule you might have a solid hour 10 minutes to yourself, after you're done picking up the house and putting things away.

5. Your oldest won’t remember life as an only child, the days you spent nursing baby #2 over playing with him/her, and will (hopefully) learn to share.


CONS:

1. Two kids in diapers. I actually don't really consider this a con (only because I would rather get them completely out of the way rather then go back to them down the road), but I think most people do so I'm listing it as one mainly because of the expense. Also, I'm sure it'll be challenging to change two babies when out and about, and always having to pack two sets of diapers for each child.

2. Less sleep. More craziness. Get used to the chaos!

3. Your oldest probably won't be old enough to truly help with the baby. Sure, they may be able to grab a diaper here and there (or 10) but I imagine having, let's say a 5 or 6 year old, would be a lot more helpful.

4. IT'S EXPENSIVE!! The bills pile on up: hospital bills...daycare costs...oy vey!

5. Your body is pretty much out of your control for awhile. You are probably either nursing (or pumping) or pregnant. It's not easy.

What might be a pro to me could be a con to you-everyone is different! Now I'm interested in hearing from you guys-do you think there is a "perfect" age gap? What helped you make your decision when expanding your family? And if this post totally bored you, feel free to comment about that too. :)

PS: If you missed my post yesterday with a promotion on the cutest Father's Day gifts, go check it out here!