But does that mean I don't have struggles or complaints? Absolutely not. I just choose not to voice them here on my blog. That being said, I don't want any of you who read my blog to just assume that I always have it together because that is far from the truth. For example...on Friday when I posted about Camden sleeping through the night. Sure, he has been sleeping great but that doesn't mean he hasn't ever woke up in the middle of the night and I'm sitting there (insert wide eyed emoticon here) thinking, "WTH?! Why is he up? Did he not get enough to eat?" Those things happen to me, too. All the time!
On any given day I probably worry about oh, 23+ things if I were to count every little one in my head and total them up (but I don't do that because if I did it would probably drive me crazy...or at least to the closest beach with a Corona in my hand.))
I struggle with:
+finding enough time in the day-when can I fit in a workout? what's for dinner? how can I have dinner ready if Cam wants to play and needs a bath? wait, I need to shower!
+mom guilt-due to sometimes missing the "old days" when it was just me and Billy and we could just pick up and go wherever, whenever we wanted
+worrying about Cam when he sleeps
+wanting to lose these last pesky pounds attached to my stomach and waist but realllyyy wanting that donut sitting in the office break room
+worrying about Cam when he is awake (when you're a new parent, you worry about almost everything)
+feeling unorganized-that our room needs cleaned but laundry also needs to be done. oh, and remember those bills that need to be paid?
+questioning pretty much every single parenting decision
+patience!
Phew. My point is that the struggle is very real for all of us. No one has a perfect life and if they act like they do, they are lying!
Just when you think you are one step ahead, something else comes your way. And similarly, it's just like what I'm learning (ahem-still trying to learn/deal with) now that I have a little one...once you think you have one thing figured out, it all changes again! But at the end of every single day, when I kiss that sweet boy on the forehead goodnight I'm reminded just how worth it it all is. Motherhood has been the best and hardest journey of my life. I would never want to go back to life before Cam!
Such an honest but beautiful post my friend - and so perfectly said! Often, our little blogs don't show the good, the bad, and the ugly because who really wants to read about the bad and the ugly all the time. But life is real - for all of us! Sending you lots of love from across the sea x
ReplyDeleteI feel you sister!! I sometimes look around in social media & think "how in the heck do they do it all!?" But then I remind myself, they don't. They prioritize & pick & choose what is most important to get done for that day. & that's what I've been doing lately. Otherwise we will worry ourselves to death! Just know you're doing a great job at being Camden's mommy!!
ReplyDeleteI totally get what you are saying. For me my blog was an escape from all the stress in our life. We struggle with infertility for 3 years now and I found solace in my blog and being able to focus on something positive in my life that I can control. So much in our lives we can't control. This is a fun outlet where we can focus on the positive of life! Thanks for this post really great! Xo
ReplyDeleteYup! It's so easy to look at other blogs and social media and feel bad about yourself because it seems like you're the only one who doesn't have it all together. I know I certainly don't. I also stress about not having time to fit it all in... I get upset that I can't do everything I want to do... I worry about money... my job... my future. Ah life is stressful.
ReplyDeleteSo true mama!! In fact I recently told my hubby that we need to hire a maid because the last thing I want to do on my weekends now is clean the house. He totally agreed! It's prioritizing what's important and it seems like you have a good balance!! xo
ReplyDeleteAll soooo true!!!!!! I especially love the "missing the old days guilt!" I'm glad I'm not the only one that has the moments from time to time...Like when I just want to run into the grocery store to get milk and now its such a process to bring a 2 year old and a 3 month old! haha!
ReplyDeleteThe good news is, you're normal. Becoming a new mom is a huge transition. I'm almost two years in and have finally hit my stride, but that first year was so... stretching. Good and wonderful but also really, really hard. But, I think it's like anything new you try... at the beginning, you're pretty clumsy, but then you sort of figure it out. Most of the time...
ReplyDeleteso very true!! love how you put that...thanks Bethe!
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