ON MARRIAGE

Yup-taking it up a notch today.

The most frequently asked question I get (besides the infamous baby one)
since being married is....
"Does your relationship change when you get married? If so, how?"

or
 "Isn't it the same as dating if you've already lived together before getting married?"

Really think about those questions for a minute.

I'm not an expert on this subject, considering I've only been married just over 2 years
and we're definitely not perfect {what couple is?},
but I'd like to give my perspective on this topic and get your feedback, too. 

I was that girl before we got married who always said I didn't think our relationship
 was going to be that different once we got married.
I mean, we already lived together for a year on our own before we got married
 (and he practically lived with me and my best friend Lindsay before that)
so what would possibly change?

 

Wrong.

 I honestly thought our relationship together would be the same because we already
went through the whole adjustment of living with friends to now each other...
sharing things (a closet-HELLO, that's a big deal!), learning how the other
 likes to clean (or not to...), etc.
I didn't understand what couples meant when they said marriage is different
and changed things, but I do now. 

I always try to explain to my friends when they ask, but it's hard to explain in words
 just exactly what I mean. 

The best way I can describe it is this-
when you are dating there is always an option to throw in the towel..

to fight over really petty small things, to nitpick..

to wonder constantly if they are or are not right for you.
you may not work as hard at it-therefore you don't get the most out of it.

When you are married, you have more passion and willingness to make your relationship work.
{or maybe it's that you just don't want to kill each other at times...}
you don't want or care about the petty arguments as much. 
 you come together as a team.

 

In my situation, marriage has completely changed our relationship for the better.

Do we still get in arguments? Of course (and then feel really silly after...)
But do we fight over the small stuff anymore? No, not as much.
Our communication is better and it just feels good that we are on the same page!
One of my favorite things that I hear from friends (besides how I'm the coolest person ever, obviously..)
is how much they can see the change in us. That makes me so happy to hear.

Truth is - marriage really is the best and I'm thankful for Billy everyday.
Sometimes I will just look at him and think about how far we've come since our college days
and am so proud and thankful.
 
Marriage takes work and "they say" that.....
 

So, here's what I ask of you. 

It's difficult to describe, but how do you think marriage has changed your relationship?
What do you think is different? or has it stayed the same?

I might use some of your answers for a future post of some sort!
{And if you're not married-just be patient. You're time/prince charming will come! :)}

to be continued....